N4 Giving & Receiving Triangle: Agemasu vs Kuremasu

The Triangle of Giving: Who gives to whom?

Japanese culture is obsessed with the "direction" of favors.

1. Ageru (あげる) - To Give (Outward)

• Direction: ME -> Others. (Or Person A -> Person B).
• Meaning: I give.
• Taboo: NEVER use "Ageru" when giving to a superior (Boss/Teacher). It sounds arrogant (like giving charity).
  • (For superiors, use humble "Sashiagemasu").
• Ex: I gave flowers to my girlfriend. (Watashi wa kanojo ni hana wo agemashita).

2. Morau (もらう) - To Receive (Inward)

• Direction: ME <- Others.
• Subject: Always the RECEIVER.
• Particle: Use NI (に) or KARA (から) for the giver.
• Ex: I received a watch from Mom. (Haha ni tokei wo moraimashita).

3. Kureru (くれる) - Give to ME (Special!)

This is the trickiest but most crucial verb.

• Direction: Others -> ME (or my family).
• Subject: Always the GIVER.
• Why do we need this?
  • English just has "Give".
  • Japanese distinguishes: "He gives to OTHERS" (Ageru) vs "He gives to ME" (Kureru).
  • Using Kureru implies Gratitude. "He kindly gave me."
• Ex:
  • (Correct) Tanaka gave me a book: Tanaka-san wa watashi ni hon wo kuremashita.
  • (Using "Agemashita" here implies Tanaka arrogantly gave it to me, emphasizing the action rather than the kindness).

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Formula Summary

1. I give to Others -> Ageru.
2. Someone gives to Someone else -> Ageru.
3. Someone gives to ME -> KURERU (Must use).